A Courageous Woman

I was devastated by the news of the assassination of Benazir Bhutto. She was a hopeful sign in an otherwise chaotic and repressive country. She was educated at Harvard and Oxford and was an anomaly in a country where few women enjoy freedom or education. What kind of a world do we live in where a woman is killed for speaking of truth, justice and equality? They killed her father in 1979 and now she has also paid the penalty for daring to speak out against the injustices in her country and in favour of democracy.

The government of the tyrant, Musharraf, was quick to blame the Taliban and Al Qaeda. But the government stood to gain from her death because her party was very popular in Pakistan and she was leading in the campaign for the January election. Remember, this is the same Musharraf who responded to the rape of a woman by a military captain by accusing the victim of prostitution.

Whether it was the fundamentalist Muslims or the dictator, she was killed by men because she was a woman who dared to stand up for her beliefs. She was a courageous woman and the world is poorer for the loss.

No one is free when others are oppressed. ~Author Unknown

Turkey Day, Cherry Winks, Reeking Lum, Honour Wall

Hello all in blogland. It's been sixteen days since my last post. Sorry, sorry, sorry. I have been busy. I moved into a larger apartment in the same block. I worked many of those days and I prepared for Christmas. Yes, I do celebrate a secular Christmas. For me the best part has always been the family get-togethers.

I had 6 for turkey dinner on Dec. 25. It was a lot of work, but worth every minute. Here for the festivities were darling daughter and her splendid spouse, sister and spouse, son-in-laws parents. We had a wonderful traditional turkey dinner and a lovely bottle of pinot noir. I lit a candle for those whom we were missing and put his stained glass creation in the window. It was wonderful to be in a bigger suite, where I could accomodate seven people for dinner. I made a toast such as he would have made: Here's to good food, good wine, and family.

One surprise package sent from Winnipeg was a gift of home-made cherry winks and Swedish Christmas cookies. Thanks a huge bunch to great friend Pat. I received many terrific gifts, too numerous to mention, but I love all of them. Many, many thanks to all the friends who sent cards and emails. Lang may your lum reek. (Old Scottish saying: Long may your chimney smoke.)

My new suite has 650 square feet and a great view of English Bay and the mountains. I am looking forward to many more opportunities to host social events. Little hint to any friends from afar that are thinking of visiting me - there is to be a new guest suite here at the block available to family and friends of residents for a mere pittance compared to hotel prices. I don't know when it will be finished, but I will keep you posted. So start planning your Vancouver getaways.

I spent a few minutes rereading the Prairie Dog Blog from December 2004. Had a little cry. I can still hear his voice when I read his blog. His Christmas remembrances are there and the cutest little touching story about a group of little ones he took on a tour through the Western Canada Aviation Museum in December 2004. How he loved life. How I miss him.

I got an email from the Reh-fit Centre. They have finally put up the memorial plaque I requested on the Honour Wall. See picture at the top of the post.

Take care...and TATA...and PEACE.

Honour A Life, Festival of Lights, Remembering Him

It is amazing to me that it was almost two years ago that Dennis died. I feel as if I have lived two lifetimes, one with him and one without.

Last night we went to the Van Dusen Botanical Gardens for the Honour A Life ceremony. It began with music and a slide show. The music was touching and made me cry. We wrote messages of love to our missing ones on Christmas decorations (plasticized cards). We lit candles and went in procession to one of the trees in the garden where we hung our Christmas decorations on a tree. I had also printed up some pictures of Dennis, my mother and my brother and we added those to the decorations. The procession through the garden wound among the lighted trees that they call The Festival of Lights. The lights were fantastical. Some of them changed colour. Some were wrapped around tufts of grass on the ground. Lights played on a fountain. It was indescribably beautiful, like some wonderful fairyland.

The Prairie Dog would not have been happy to hear the references to god in the program. Just because it is "non-denominational" doesn't make it inoffensive. He would have been offended. But I was happy to be there. Many of my bereavement group friends were there and my daughter, son-in-law and sister. It is good to be able to share our losses in community. So I ignored the religious references.

But, in order to be all-inclusive there should be no mention of religion or god in the program. I am an atheist and a humanist and proud of it. Atheism is not just a lack of religion. It is faith in the present, faith in nature. It is faith in the ability of human beings to love and take care of each other. I do not believe in anything supernatural. There are wonders enough in the natural world for me. And wonders enough created by humans...like the Festival of Lights.

I don't know whether I will have time to post more entries this week because I will be quite busy between work and moving. But on December 16 I will remember. I know many of you will too. This video doesn't really relate to this festive time of year, but it is him, so here it is.

Dennis Ousey June 14, 1947-December 16, 2005

He was a man who loved controversy, practical jokes and family.

LD Party, Moving, Timmy's Is Comin' To Town

Here is a picture of me and two work friends at the London Drugs Christmas party. We had a lovely roast beef dinner and the view from the 31st floor of the hotel was fabulous.

I have a couple of pieces of good news. Well, they are good news to me. And I need good news right about now.

The first is: I am moving into a larger apartment in my block. It's just down the hall and so the transfer will be relatively easy since we won't even need the elevator. It will happen over the next week and by Christmas I should be settled into my new place. Details on the address will be in email to all my friends and family soon.

The new apartment has 600 square feet! Every room is bigger. More cupboard space in the kitchen. Bigger living room. Bigger bedroom. I will have room for a dining room suite. Wow! And I have a view of English Bay. I can have a "Fireworks Party" next summer. For those who have never witnessed it, there are fireworks displays four evenings in the summer and thousands of people descend on the West End to view them. They are spectacular.

The other good news is: there will be a Tim Horton's in the store front of my block! I emailed the company and told them there were store fronts for lease here and told them they should get a Timmy's at this end of Davie Street. The building managers told me a few days ago that T. H. signed a lease. Unbelieveable! I looooooove my Timmy's coffee! And muffins, and donuts and soup and sandwiches.... Yahoo. Heaven on earth! I may never cook again.

Now, if I can just get some storage space in the block so I don't have to store 20 boxes in a storage locker...well, we can't have everything. We need something to work towards.

Tata...and take care...and PEACE.

Peace is not something you wish for; it's something you make, something you do, something you are, something you give away. Robert Fulgham

Loved Ones and Slushy Snow

It's been a while since my last blog but my heart hasn't been in it lately. The Christmas season is a tough time of year for anyone who has lost a loved one. The anniversary of his last hospital stay is approaching.

On Monday, Nov. 10 Margot, Joel and I will be attending a ceremony to "Honour a Life." There will be a candlelight parade and the attaching of his name to a tree. My sister and her husband will also be there. There are other family griefs to acknowledge also. Our mother, our brother, Papa (my father-in-law) my sister's brother-in-law and my son-in-law's grandfather. Everyone has suffered losses.

Our mother died on November 26, 1990. Our brother on September 7, 1999. See pictures. I have those two pictures because he scanned them into a computer. Thanks to the old Prairie Dog.

Work at London Drugs goes on. I am grateful for the opportunities to keep busy and keep my mind off grieving for a few hours. One bright note: I won a $50 gift certificate from LD.

The weather here has been weird. For the last two nights it was slightly below zero and it has been snowing. Now it is zero and there is lots of slushy snow. Even though it's snowing people carry umbrellas. They do call this "Raincity," don't they? Tomorrow the prediction is for + 11 degrees! 4 mm of snow and people don't want to go out! I am told the Skytrain can be brought to a halt by a little snow on the track. Strange. This is like a very nice winter day to me.

Love to all. Especially those grieving a loss. My heart is with you.

[A] final comfort that is small, but not cold: The heart is the only broken instrument that works. ~T.E. Kalem